stumbled across this song, really like it.

UNITY

trying to figure out which song i like better.

grey haired girl

i’ve been taking the train more to and from work because of the weather.  it’s really nice to ride the train after a long time of riding my bike to and from the loop.  on my way to work there was this man who seemed pretty angry.  he was holding a newspaper with rod blagojevich on the cover yelling, “THIS IS NOT FUNNY!”  he was walking around and holding it close to random people’s faces while saying it.  i thought to myself, “well, i didn’t think it was funny until just now, thanks to you.”  the look on the people’s faces that he held the newspaper in front of and yelled was hilarious.  then i remembered that i also thought it was funny last night when my roommate was drunk from wine and doing an impression of what the conversations rod was having on the phone must have sounded like.  she was swearing up a storm.  “that motherfuckin’ seat is a fuckin’ gold mine, motherfucker!  daddy’s not giving that shit up for fuckin’ nothin’, no fuckin’ way!”

anyhow, on my way home from work i saw a girl that was definitely younger than even 30, yet she had granny grey hair.  i guessed she was probably really close to around my age.  i had seen her once before, but she was on the same train car as me this time and sat at the other end from me.  i spent the whole way to logan square wondering why her hair was like that.  she was fashionably dressed and pretty.  i assumed, because of how young she looked, she must have dyed her hair grey. then i wondered why she would do that.  not that it looked bad, it was just weird to me.  she reminded me of a superhero or something, someone who could possibly have telepathic abilities.  so i looked at her and when i thought she might have noticed me, i asked her, in my head, “why is your hair grey?”

i usually think it’s a bit silly when adults dye their hair wacky colors, but grey totally works.  i think this girl is onto something, like is she crazy or just so cool that i can’t even possibly wrap my brain around it? i bet anyone with pink or blue hair would be totally jealous of her.

p.s.

hump day jam.

airplane

the other day one of my girls asked me what a tampon was.  i laughed and so she asked me if it was inappropriate.  i told her it wasn’t an inappropriate question, i just didn’t really want to answer it.  she told me it was okay that i didn’t answer because she read about it in a book anyway.  she said, “it’s something you put in your vageena.”  she said it just like that and when i laughed, she said, “or va-gina, or whatever.”  she said that last part of the word vagina like gina, the woman’s name.

it was funny, but more than that, it made me sad that all those kids were going to have to go through those awkward puberty years.  my sister jacie is going through them right now.  i always hope that it was just worse for me than it will be for them.

i remember most of my friends in junior high smoked newports, listened to eazy-e and wore basketball jerseys with sports bras underneath.  i knew i didn’t fit in with them, but at the time i thought they were fun and they were the only kids at my school that could stay out late on school nights with me.

they always had boyfriends, so i decided i should pretend to want one also.  they first time i kissed a boy, he had just eaten cool ranch doritos.  it was horrible.  i think i tell that story every time someone offers me cool ranch doritos, as if i need an excuse to not wanting any.

the second time i kissed a boy, i realized i was probably one of few people that knew what it was like to french kiss a cow.  his tongue couldn’t have been even close to the average size of a human being’s.  after i caught my breath, i said to myself, “fuck this forever.”  or something a long those lines.

i then became the third wheel to my friends and whatever boys they were dating at the time.  one night i was uptown elmhurst with my best friend at the time, and some boy that she met who told her that he stole his parents money and ran away from home.  i awkwardly followed them around until he finally offered me $20 if i would go find something else to do.  i’m pretty sure they went in some alley so he could feel her up, and i went to jewel and spent all the money he gave me on candy.  i sat by the fountain eating candy until she finally met back up with me so that my mom could come pick us up.  i remember feeling really young and out of place that night, but i just kept reminding myself that it could be worse, i could be my friend in that alley.

duh!

or

boyz 2 men

last week i went on a field trip with the kids from the school to the circus.  on the bus ride home we saw a man choking a woman on the side of the road.  the bus was still moving, so gabe just yelled out the window and apparently scared the guy because he let go of the woman and walked away.  the kids kept talking about it the whole way home, and i didn’t know what to say to the kids about it.  all i could think to do was make one of my boys promise that he would never hit his girlfriend(s) when he grew up.  he right away promised that he never would and added, “i wouldn’t even hit my girlfriend if she was ugly!”

this is my cousin drew.  he is usually crabby and cries a lot.  one time a random lady was telling him how cute he was and he told her to shut up.  i’m obviously not around him a whole lot, but as far as i can tell, i think that story sums him up pretty well.

anyhow, my sister had a housewarming party last weekend, and drew showed up.  i decided that i was going to try and make him like me.  it totally worked.  he followed me around the whole time he was there, it even got to the point where i was trying to hide from him eventually.  i made him like me by taking into consideration what he would consider to be fun.  which isn’t making baby noises and telling him how cute he is, but by pretending that me and him were going to go around and cut all the girl’s hair off at the party.  i would be like, “let’s go cut off brooke’s hair!!”, and he would laugh and laugh.  and then he started pointing at any girl he saw and saying that we should cut their hair off.  he loved the idea of that.  at one point i said, “i’m going to cut your mommy’s hair off!”.  that time he didn’t laugh or anything.  he got angry and screamed, “noooooooooooo!!”

we are thinking about cutting your hair off.

i like to do it weird

when the wind changed

yes

i would like to own both of these.

from derekerdman.com